Random gratuitous ramblings

Despite how my tricky back-dating skillZ make it appear, this is actually a new blog, with all previous entries being copied from the emails I've sent my friends and family since I arrived here in France. That being said, I feel the narcissistic desire to have somewhere to post the things I don't consider (interesting//) important enough to send home.

Learning a new language is frustrating. Especially French. I constantly feel like I'm hitting my head against a wall. I recently a remembered a speech that the director of SYA (the program with which I studied in Italy during my junior year of high school) about how the 4 extra years that studying abroad in high school gives you are so important in terms of language learning skills and your attitude towards the experience. I have to say I kind of agree. I love France but nothing will ever match the naive arrogance that comes with ex-patriating at 17.

I finally an affirmation about my French progress this weekend. My host parents mentioned at dinner last night about how much progress I've made since I've been here. (YES!) It was really reassuring, because its difficult to notice any changes on a day to day basis.

The stress of it all has even pushed me to start doing some strange things. Well, not strange by normal American standards, but certainly strange for me.
I've started running.
And journaling on a regular basis. Anyone who knows me knows that I absolutely HATE both of these things. I have tried to pick them up over the years, but they never stuck. Especially the running thing. But I've begun doing both here. I think its due to a lack of any other outlets. Without my friends to listen (or ignore) as I over-analyze every silly detail of my life in easy English, I find myself scribbling in any notebooks that are laying around, just to be able to express myself in a language that I have a comprehensive grasp on. And the running thing. I don't have any other outlet for activity (for very complicated logistical reasons including not having my student ID card yet), so I started running as my only option to get my endorphin fix (something that anyone struggling with a language definitely needs!). It's oddly satisfying, slightly addicting, and extremely painful.

That being said. I love butchering the French language. Well, I'm sure I would love speaking it properly even more, but I'm working on that. Sometimes when I'm listening to French people chatting at the speed of light, I'm overcome with a jealous desire to be able to do what they are doing. And then of course, I look around and realize that's exactly what I'm in the process of learning. Talk about an affirmation. And while there is nothing quite as exhausting as carrying on conversation for several hours in French, there's nothing quite as elating either.